Unblemished

Written By A.A.L.

I'm glad Jesus doesn't feel the need

to keep himself "unblemished" by me.


He is not too proud to crouch in the dirt

and write my name

while Good Christian People

sneer at my shame

and try to throw stones at me

anyway. 


He doesn't distance his heart

from my heart;

doesn't scoff at the tears in my eyes;

He doesn't believe that I'm "playing the victim"

when I have flashbacks of times I was terrorized

by people who claimed they were loving and kind.

He doesn't pull back

from my trauma and pain,

doesn't rebuke me because I am gay,

doesn't look at me with disgust and disdain

for just being human,

for just being me:

because Genesis 1 

comes before Genesis 3.


Before snakes and apples

and "original sin,"

we were beloved, the crown of creation!

Made in God's image, esteemed and adored --

this is the purpose God made us for.


Those Good Christians taught me

God can't be around sin,

doesn't like when his kids disobey;

He's too holy to tolerate our blemishes --

So every little mistake you make

and every sinful action you take

puts you further away from him.


And yet Jesus came down??

and put on our skin??

and ate with the "worst" of us, again and again?

Sounds more like a Potter 

who will do what it takes

to shape and reshape

the precious clay

he first shaped in his image,

undoing the curse, undoing the damage


a gritty God, who looks for us

in the cool of the garden, in the cracks and the dust

of our heartbroken world --

He is not afraid

and he is not ashamed

to clothe us in his righteousness

and give us his name

and a place in his kingdom, defined by his love

not by purity culture

or church every Sunday;

all the heavy burdens over years have made

me skeptical of their untouchable gods,

who care more about "holiness" and "obedience"

than intimacy and sweet reverence.


God didn't begrudgingly save you, my friend --

He ransomed what already belongs to him.

We're sinners in the hands of a loving God,

and the Jesus I know 

is tender and kind;

who kneels close to your face

and writes your name

on his hands

and the dust 

from whence you came


So I'm glad that this God 

 knows our immeasurable worth --

redeemed and restored now,

to unblemished earth.

A.A.L.

Since middle school, A.A.L. has been using writing to make sense of the world around and within her. A poet since adolescence, an essayist since high school, and a published author since 2023, she explores themes of faith, sexuality, and spiritual formation with honesty and hope. Her writing serves as both prayer and practice—a place to bring the complexities of following Jesus as a Side B Christian before the God who sees and knows her fully. She is passionate about encouraging others through thoughtful reflections on healing, discipleship, and cross-cultural perspectives. Whether writing poetry, essays, or personal reflections, she hopes her words help readers feel less alone and more deeply rooted in Christ. When she isn’t writing, she’s happiest outdoors, notebook in hand, continuing to observe, reflect, and listen.

"My journey regarding the intersection of faith and sexuality has been shaped by growing up in conservative evangelical spaces during the purity culture of the 1990s and 2000s. For years I lived under the weight of shame, trying at different times both to suppress and to satisfy my longing for other women. Eventually, I found a home in Side B theology—a way of living that doesn’t feel like a compromise of either my faith or my sexuality.

I’ve been a writer my whole life, and writing has always been how I process what God is doing in me. In the past, I’ve often written for “outside” audiences, trying to explain the experience of being a gay Christian to those who didn’t understand. Now, I feel especially drawn to encourage those within the Side B and broader LGBTQ+ community.

Through my writing, I hope readers come away thinking, “I needed to hear that today,” or “I’ve never thought about it that way.” More than anything, I want to offer comfort to fellow travelers on this narrow road—to speak honestly about the hard things so others feel seen, understood, and less alone.

In my writing for Revoice’s Our Voices Blog, I’m especially passionate about exploring spiritual formation, healing, and cross-cultural perspectives." — A.

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